Cindy’s Weekly Wisdom

I hate to be a cynic, but I think I might be becoming one when it come to this oxymoron* ~ Useful gifts. More specifically, useful generic gifts. My mother gave me a drip irrigation system for Christmas. Let me tell you, that’s a useful gift, and I am so appreciative. (Thanks Mom!) But what about these “useful” gifts that have recently come into my home:

• water bottles and bandannas from a child’s birthday party.
• water bottles as a “finisher’s prize” for a book reading contest
• water bottles given to the kids when they went to camp for a day
• bandannas as a party favor at an adult party
• cheap backpacks given as a promotion for Lemonaid Day (a fundraising event for kids)
• expensive backpack given to my daughter when she was in the hospital
• expensive backpacks given to my husband annually when he attends a conference
• tote bags given at conferences and as promotions in stores
• soap, lotions and other toiletries
• and let’s not forget T-shirts for registering or participating in nearly any event

Sure, on their own, each one of these items can be useful. I’m not going to argue with that. A water bottle, a bandanna, a back pack, a tote bag, a t-shirt – all these items can be useful. But I went from having a just-right number of water bottles to having an explosion of them. My kids have backpacks, and each one lasts for two school years. I’ve already decluttered a half dozen bandannas; now I have more. As for t-shirts, let me just say that when I started decluttering, my husband had 100.

What’s a declutterer to do? First off, I try to leave these things behind when they are offered to me. Yes, you might have to step out of your comfort zone to say “no thanks” rather than just accepting what’s handed to you. This helps with clutter, but unfortunately, there is still the larger environmental impact of that item’s existence. We don’t need these things (or even want them), and the fact that they exist means that the raw materials have been gathered, and they have been manufactured, transported, etc. – a waste of perfectly good energy.

To make my small impact on these larger issues, I have resisted gifts more and more. (As Colleen once wrote, Don’t the very words “stocking stuffer” = “unnecessary item”.) If it’s not truly a want or need of someone in the family, we don’t buy it. We make gifts. I shop at the thrift stores, Craiglist, and Ebay first; local stores next; the mall last. This year I vowed to give no material gifts to my children’s friends. For my own friends, with whom I rarely exchange gifts anyway, I give something very practical, like a homemade frozen meal. (Way more appreciated at Christmas time than more candy or a Santa trinket, I guarantee you!) If there’s nothing I really want, I ask for a gift certificate to my favorite online store, Amazon.com, where I can buy practically anything when the need does arise.

When did “I love you and value your friendship” start to equal “so I’ll give you some cheap crap to show it”? Or “I’m so grateful that you came to my conference that I’ll load you up on items you can’t possibly use” become a standard business practice? Only by becoming conscious of choices in all areas of our lives can we start to change and to change the people around us. I know I’ve had an influence on my friends and on you, our readers, and I know you have too. Let’s be like water on a pond sending ripples of wisdom outward instead of thoughtless consumers of more, more, and more.

*For those of you who are not native English speakers, an oxymoron is a figure of speech where two apparently opposite ideas are paired.

Today’s Declutter Item

I have looked forward to this day from the very beginning of my declutter mission and it has finally arrived. This is the hutch section of an entertainment unit that is no longer suitable to fit the TV into. It is big and dark and bulky and held a lot of stuff I never really used or loved. By slowly decluttering spaces in the bottom section of this unit, in the kitchen cupboards and the bookcase it is finally empty and a man named Brian will be recycling it to create other pieces of furniture. It was picked up today by Brian and his brother Bob and I am glad to see it go.

Display Cabinet

My Gratitude List

• Something that made me laugh ~ My husband poking fun at our daughter because her favourite baseball team lost again today. It is an ongoing love hate relationship between them during the baseball season, mostly love though of course.
• Something Awesome ~ Learning to say no when you really don’t want to do something.
• Something to be grateful for ~ The three people who picked up Freecycle items from me today.
• Something that made me happy ~ How light and airy my living room looks without the big display cabinet.
• Something I found fascinating ~ Watching the big storm front build up to the north today. It is now rumbling overhead. Weather is interesting and so different here than it was in Seattle.

It matters not how fast I go, I hurry faster when I’m slow

When we get to a point where we are shopping to fill a void in our lives then it is time to stop and think ~

• What is happening here? ~ Instead of facing reality and doing something to improve whatever unsatisfactory situation you find yourself in, you turn to your drug of choice, shopping, to give you that little pick-me-up that you are craving for.
• Why do I do this? ~ In this day and age we behave this way because we are conditioned to it. In the modern consumer society we have become accustomed to the idea that shopping is a feel good activity and if we want to feel good what simpler thing is there to do.
• Is that what I am doing? ~ Quite often we don’t realise that we are shopping to fill a void we just think we like shopping but even if you aren’t aware of it doesn’t mean the problem doesn’t exist.
• How did it come to this? Self preservation  is a natural instinct whether that be physical or emotional nobody wants to feel pain, so we do what we can to drown it out. Emotional pain manifests itself in many ways, loneliness, boredom, helplessness, frustration, weariness, sadness… and who wouldn’t want to avoid those things even just for a little while.

Then there are the counterarguments…

• What harm is it doing? ~ Environmentally alone, it is doing more harm than you could possibly even think of. If you have children it is setting a bad example for them, not just because of the lack of concern for the environment but it teaches them the same bad habits.
• It’s my money why can’t I spend it how I like? Sure it is your money although in some cases it is the banks money and people rack up credit card debt that only makes their situation worse. Lets say it is your money and you are shopping within your budget. Do you find yourself surrounded by clutter that you are reluctant to get rid of because you wasted good money on it. Could the money go to better use like your children future education, paying down the home load, eating healthier food…

Lets face it, if we have come to the point where we are shopping as an activity for fulfillment then there has to be something lacking in our lives. If we don’t know what the thing is then we haven’t got anything to lose by taking the opportunity to try new things. Sometimes we dismiss activities without even giving them a go because we don’t think we will enjoy them. This can be a big mistake because when we do this we can be closing ourselves off to great possibilities. Below I have listed some activities to try to give yourself something fullfilling in your life…

• Try a new sport ~ Not only enjoyable but healthy as well.
• Volunteer in your community ~ this can be amazingly rewarding for both you and the recipient of your time and skills.
• Increase activities with friends and family ~ go walking, cycling, hiking, dining out, fishing, visit the art gallery…
• Do something educational ~ cooking or art classes, learn a language, take a computer class…
• Explore your community ~ visit your local information centre and get to know the area around where you live. This knowledge comes in handy when you get visitors from out of town or maybe you could become so proficient you could become a local tour guide. Who knows!!
• Take up a new hobby ~ just don’t get carried away buying supplies.
• Gardening ~ grow your own herbs and vegetables, this can very rewarding, therapeutically and monetarily.

This are just a few ways to fill in your time , give you a boost and keep away from the shops. I am sure you can think of many more. Like anything sometimes the hardest part is getting started but can be so rewarding once you find that one thing that floats your boat.

Just remember that if all else fails don’t dismiss the idea of seeking counselling. If we live in denial that there is a problem these situations can escalate out of control. Not admitting there is a problem doesn’t make it go away so please be kind to yourself and seek help when needed.

Today’s Declutter Item

This drawer divider used to hold all sorts of stationary goodies but now they are all decluttered and what is left doesn’t require such a large storage container. So it’s off to the thrift store with this item.

Drawer Oganiser

My Gratitude List

• Something that makes me laugh ~ Tickling babies and making them laugh.
• Something Awesome ~ Checking your lottery ticket and finding you won something.
• Something to be grateful for ~ That fact that no matter where I have lived I have had no shortage of friends.
• Something that makes me happy ~ Going to breakfast every Saturday with my husband ~ sometimes Liam comes along too.
• Something I find fascinating ~ That if you try hard enough you can find a good side to almost anything.

It matters not how fast I go, I hurry faster when I’m slow

Way back on day 94 I wrote a post called – When a bargain isn’t a bargain – and just recently I started a post on Unclutterer Forums titled – Can you justify your last purchase?

The old post from day 94 is worth a second read if you are a sucker for a bargain and have a home cluttered with them. Some of these bargains prove useful while others whose low buying price is the main focus of attraction soon become guilt clutter taking up space in your home.

As for the topic I started on Unclutterer Forums I was a little amazed at how many people can justify a purchase simply because it was a bargain. I have fallen into this trap many times in the past myself. Now I reserve my bargain hunting for when there is something I am planning on buying and want to get the best deal unlike in the past where I would stumble upon a great deal and not be able to resist.

Very few of the of the bargain purchases written about in this thread were justified by the fact that they were a replacement item or a planed purchase. Some purchases were consumable and others were digital which don’t cause clutter so that fits in with the theme of the forum. Some contributors were realistic and claimed their purchase as unjustified. But there were a number of comments that really had my head spinning.

I know I am starting to sound like the “Shopping Police” here but my mind keeps going back to several concepts I was considering when I used the word JUSTIFY. These were …

• Declutter the don’t reclutter
• Sustainability
• Supply and demand
• Environment
• Credit card debt
• Recreational shopping trap – Just buying things for the fun of it.
• Need v Want

I know everyone has their own individual level of clutter tolerance and that is for each one of us to decide. I also admit that I have been very guilty of the – purchase – loose interest – declutter – reclutter cycle in the past but I am so glad to have hopped off the merry-go-round. I just want to get the message out for people to consider the seven points above when they make future purchases as it isn’t just about clutter it is also about the environment and sensible spending.

Bargains are hard to resist but remember a bargain is only a bargain if it isn’t going to quickly become clutter itself.  Sometimes this even applies if the new item is replacing a perfectly functional item which then becomes redundant unused clutter just because the former is shiny and new. My laptop nearly ended up this way but I decided that I would rather persevere with it until it really becomes a problem to use.

Item 319 of 365 less things

Like I said yesterday we have more than enough of these that we don’t need to keep broken ones. someone picked it up off the footpath during curb-side pick up week.

5 Things I am grateful for today

1. Bicycle helmets – Liam was wearing his when he had his accident and it is probably the only reason he is alive today and recovering so well.
2. The comment my darling daughter left today
3. Alarm clocks – My daughter had a 6:20am flight this morning and we had to be up at 4:14am to get ready and drive the 40 minutes to the airport. Thanks to the alarm clock everything went to plan. Travel can get expensive if you miss the alarm and subsequently your flight.
   
4. My laptop – It has it’s little quirks but it has served me well.
5. My husbands editing skills – He often has to pull me up on things I write that although not intended sound a little pompous. He does this without judgement or curtailing my personal style. Sometimes I have to do a bit of a rewrite like today so I hope this post didn’t end up sounding pompous anyway.
   

…that is the question. Well actually it isn’t a question any more because I made a decision. I am talking about my sock drawer, not earth shattering, high drama stuff I know but just one more area to consider.

So I emptied it out, matched up the odd socks that had escaped from their partners, stretched a few pair of nylons (stockings or whatever you like to call them) to make sure they weren’t perished beyond usefulness and pondered over the many pairs of socks that I have to admit haven’t been worn for some time. I took into account that this was my sock drawer so half empty or full it would still be my sock drawer because I had no other use for it. At that point I came to my decision.

I will let natural progression decluttering take place on this occasion. Socks tend to wear out at a fairly rapid pace with regular use so I will use my favourites until they go in the trash and then use the bottom dwellers thus getting full use out of every pair.  Were I to throw away or donate the bottom dwellers I would have to buy replacements sooner thus increasing supply and demand for new pairs.

I know this hasn’t been the most informative or fascinating post I have ever written but it just goes to prove not everything needs decluttering.

ITEM 222 OF 365 LESS THINGS

My son didn’t want these any more so I gave them to the son of a friend of mine. He is a Star Wars fan.

There is an election going on at the moment here in Australia. The politicians often jump on the environmental bandwagon to win votes. The issues they promise they are going to address when they win are just a drop in the bucket to what really needs doing.

In fact they aren’t prepared to do much at all when it comes to the manufacturing of pointless garbage like…

• the free toys in kids meals and other promotional products
• wasteful single use gadgets
• shoddy appliances that don’t last and can’t be repaired
• Disposable cutlery & plates
• Cheap souvenirs
• The sheer quantity of seasonal decorations
• Gas guzzling cars
• And the over-packaging of most of the above

just to name a few.

Generating manufacturing creates economic wealth and employment regardless of how unnecessary the end resulting items are.  So no politician is going to put a stop to any of that. So we will just keep on causing massive pollution until the supply and demand of these products are eliminated. The only thing that is going to have an effect on this is you the consumer.

Supply and demand is just that. If we stop demanding (buying) it they will stop supplying it. It is really that simple. No manufacturer is going to make something that no one is buying. Supply will always be limited to demand and even if that just reduces the quantities supplied it would be a great improvement for the environment.

Think twice about what you are doing with your money and your actions.

• Don’t accept free useless stuff just because it is free
• Avoid using plastic utensils when you are eating out.
• Take a carry bag with you when you go shopping so you don’t have to accept plastic bags
• When buying a new car buy what you need not some gas guzzling monstrosity just because it looks cool
• Use the same decorations year in year out. It is possible to celebrate an occasion without polluting the planet.
• You can julienne vegetables, crush garlic, chop an onion, dice an apple, slice potatoes… with just one gadget, a knife. Sure it might take longer but unless you are running a restaurant kitchen will the time saved really make that much difference.

See what you can do this week to reduce supply and demand. I will keep a track of my efforts and let you know next Sunday how I went.

ITEM 214 OF 365 LESS THINGS

You can sell just about anything on ebay. This item made a nice $14.00.