Hi Readers, today for Simple Saturday I have decided to give you a little puzzle to solve. Your mission is to guess, from the photo provided below, what my declutter item is going to be for Monday. I have given you a small fragment of the larger photo of this item and it is up to you to guess what it is. Just leave me a comment if you think you know. The answer will be revealed in Today’s Declutter Item on Monday.
I liked Sabine  take on gift giving and receiving in this comment.
Jo’s concerns were quite valid in her comment about the perils of upsetting people when decluttering obligation clutter.
Snosie tells us how she has soaked up my advice over the last couple of months and is putting it in to action in this comment.
Jude has some great cable recycling tips for our American readers in her comment in response to The Great Cable Roundup.
Sharron reminds us again in this comment about how one can be inspired to reduce their belonging when they have experience the heartbreak of decluttering when a loved one has passed away.
Some are long time readers, some new to my blog but it is always good to hear from them in the comments. There are several other readers with blogs that I will also feature in upcoming Fridays.
Willow at Willows Cottage
Chelle at On the domestic front
Angle Kay at Minimalist with 3 kids
Karin at  Green and Generous
Lynn at Defrag my life
There is nothing like a little cash incentive to reinforce the benefits of decluttering. Although my son is already very good at decluttering, receiving $32 for the sale of this jacket through eBay will go a long way towards encouraging him to keep up the good work.
Liam's Jacket $32 on ebay
Today my husband and I walked for miles on the Sydney streets visiting art galleries. It was a lovely day together but I am exhausted and am going to be grateful to lay my head on my pillow in my own bed tonight. I am also grateful to my husband of course for planning the gallery visits and for being with me in Sydney for my radio interview.
In the spirit of optimism I was anticipating a jump in Australian readers today due to my live-to-air radio gig on Nightlife with Tony Delroy on ABC radio last night. If that is the case I would like to extend a hearty…
…to those new readers and I hope you will find my blog informative, helpful, friendly and at times maybe even a little entertaining.
Aspirational clutter is any items that you aspire to using one day but one day never seems to come or items you used to use and “intend” to use again, but that never seems to happen. This could include…
…all of which are likely to be one or all of the following ~ out of date, out of fashion, perishing, collecting dust, wasting space and worst of all causing you angst.
When these items come into your field of vision they usually make you cringe either because of the money you have wasted on them, the disappointment in yourself for not living up to your own expectations or frustration from not having the time or energy to devote to them and knowing that you probably never will. In some cases these items represent an interest that although you had an idea to dabble in you really didn’t have the aptitude for.
My first advice is don’t be too hard on yourself and also don’t ever let this situation deter you from aspiring to other dreams in the future. My second piece of advice is to make a calculated choice as to what unsettles you the most, the thought of decluttering these items or thought of continuing to live with them cluttering up your home. What is greater, the chance that you are never going to use them or the chance that you are going to regret getting rid of them? Can you perhaps downsize your collection and see how you feel about that rather than getting rid of it all in one fell swoop.
If you find yourself on the fence, so to speak, not able to make a decision one way of the other perhaps it’s time to enlist the opinion of those close to you. Your wife may have been biting her tongue for months/years waiting for you to remove that eyesore from the back yard. You husband is secretly delighted that you might finally declutter your craft supplies and free up some space so he can reconfigure his well used office area. The kids will be so relieved that all that junk is out of the garage and they can get in and out of the car without worrying about scratching the paint on the doors. The thought that one choice could bring pleasure to someone you love may just make the decision a whole lot easier.
Finally, if you do decide to declutter don’t be too hard on yourself, don’t dwell on guilt, regret or disappointment. Rejoice in the fact the you have added tranquility to your surroundings, relief from unfulfilled aspirations and the freedom to open your mind up to new pursuits. With a little effort you may be able to find a new owner for you stuff who will immediately use and enjoy the gifts you bestow on them.
The lesson for the future is to try before you buy next time. Make sure you are ready, willing and able to enjoy the next pursuit you aspire to before equipping yourself for it. And even when you are sure, make certain to only take on enough supplies/equipment to enjoy the pastime without it taking over your life and space.
Some of these old records have been with me for thirty plus years and most of them haven’t been played for about twenty years. I am not sure why I have hung on to them for so long. I am sure most of them are available on CD or can be downloaded to iPod and lets face it we decluttered the record player back on day 150 of my challenge back on May 30 last year.
My Old Records
Although I am writing this post in advance I know that today I am going to be grateful and relieved that my live-to-air radio experience is now in my past and that anxiety is out of the way for now. I hope that I have proved to myself I can handle a situation like that just in case I am called upon to do it again in the future.
Recently I spent Sunday looking at open houses. All of the houses were clean and nicely presented, and all of the garages were full of stuff. In some houses, the stuff in the garage was unpacked; in others, it was already in boxes. Boy, oh boy, did all these folks have a lot of stuff. I asked each of the real estate agents why the owners were selling. There was a divorce, a job loss, an unexpected opportunity to buy a nicer house in the same neighborhood, and a new business starting in a different part of the country. For the most part, the need to move took these families somewhat by surprise.
Back in March, when my husband was unexpectedly presented with a new job possibility, I asked if we should have our houses decluttered enough to move at the drop of the hat. (You can refresh your memory here.) As a group we decided that there was decluttering for everyday life, and even more severe decluttering for moving.
Now I’m reflecting on this again. None of these families saw the move coming more than a month or two in advance.  When Dan and I got married we did have a fair amount of time to plan our move. Later when we moved to our current house, it happened more suddenly. I was pregnant with our second child and thought we needed an additional bedroom. Also, we lived very close to the freeway, and there was talk of expanding the freeway two additional lanes. Dan still says my thinking was addled by hormones, but when I decided we were moving, it happened pretty fast.
You don’t need to add “have a garage sale and get rid of 20 years worth of stuff†to your to-do list if life throws you a curve or a great opportunity. Getting rid of things that you no longer need, want, or value will allow you to negotiate the still and rough waters of life with more ease and grace.
I am not sure why it took so long for this calculator to come to my notice but I am sure glad it did because it fetched a nice $41.00 on eBay. Â
Scientific Calculator sold on eBay for $41.00
My little boy turned 20 today which reminds me how grateful I am that he recovered so well from his accident last year. I am also grateful for how close he and his sister are. They have a lot to bind them together both as sibling and as friends.
Chelle's obligation clutter bear
Today I am continuing my Disassociation Series, and this week we are dealing with obligation clutter. This is a tricky one because it is easy enough to identify these items and know you want to get rid of them but there is a fear that you may offend someone else should they find out you have .
What is obligation clutter? These are items that someone gave you that you no longer want, and sometimes never wanted in the first place, but you now feel obliged to keep it so you do not upset or offend the giver. They are often…
I have to be honest here in saying that the only thing really standing in the way of getting rid of these objects is YOU!
At this point, I know I have probably offended a few of my readers with my suggestions. I am willing to take that risk in the attempt to help you to take a risk to make the space you live in be the best, most comfortable, most rewarding, easy to care for, tranquil place it can possibly be. It is after all * Your space * Your home * Your sanctuary * Your life * Yours to take care of * Your time * Your freedom to do with it what you please.
I hear you saying but, but, but, and there are a lot of buts…
And that situation isn’t going to change if everyone keeps pandering to that behaviour. If she confronts you on the issue, politely explain to her that you no longer wanted to keep the item for whatever reason and let her deal with her own feelings on the issue. She is your mother and I am sure in the end your love is more important to her than stuff.
If she cares that much for you she will understand. Communication is what is lacking here, she probably keeps making you stuff because you keep accepting it. All you need to say is that you appreciate everything that she does for you but you don’t need any more (fill in the blank) as you have more than enough already.
That may be a good reason to keep it but if you truly don’t want it, ask your father to entrust it to another member of the family who will cherish it in their home. He cared enough to offer it to you I am sure he cares enough for you not to hold a grudge against you for not wanting it.
I know you are probably thinking “You make it sound like it is so simple, but it isn’t!” and in some cases you are probably right. What I suggest is to give it a try, get rid of one thing on your obligation clutter list and see what happens. Pick an item least likely to cause a problem and be brave. If the person involved doesn’t mention its absence or doesn’t suddenly start giving you the cold shoulder then you can consider it a success and move on to the next object. Quite often the situation is only as big as you blow it up to be in your own mind.
Just to prove that people do survive these encounters I will give you some examples.
One of the first things I decluttered was a silver tea set my parents gave me for my 21st birthday. Yes, I did consider at the time that my parents may notice its absence. My parents have since visited my home and I have visited theirs and nothing has been mentioned about the missing tea set. I can only assume that they either didn’t notice or they did and weren’t mortally offended. Either way I am happy not to have to polish it any more.
My son brought out a batch of T-shirts to be decluttered last week and among those was one that his dad and I had bought him when we were in Italy last year. I knew he had never worn it, I also know he is very particular about what he wears and I am not offended that he has decluttered it. He also knew when he gave it to me to declutter that I had given it to him but he is clearly secure enough in our relationship not to be concerned about my reaction.
When I went to visit my mother recently she offered me to take whatever I wanted from her china cabinet. Her plan is to offer these items to each of her children and grandchildren, so these treasures end up with those who truly appreciate them. Â I politely declined the offer because, although she has many beautiful things, I have no need or want for them. If she was offended she sure didn’t show it and she is still phoning me to say hello so no problems there.
Some years back my mother suggested I buy her a set of salt and pepper grinders for her Christmas gift and I did so. I chose a good brand with a lifetime warranty. As I had moved overseas, it was three years before I visited my parents home again. This gift was nowhere to be seen even though the warranty suggested they should have been around for many years to come. What happened to them? I don’t know because even though I noticed their absence I was not at all offended by it and wasn’t about put my parents an awkward position by inquiring.
My point here is that ultimately its our relationships with people that truly matter not relationships with stuff. Anyone who truly cares for you will not be offended by the fact that you decluttered something that they gave you. Yes, they might notice but etiquette should prevail in such a situation and, if an inquiry of an item’s whereabouts is made, provide an honest response that should also be accepted with grace.
I have been selling some items on ebay again and this Tupperware bread keeper sold for $15.50. I underestimated the postage on this item and lost out there but this is the first time I have made that mistake so I’ll chalk that up to experience. Postage can be a case of swings and roundabouts sometimes because I overestimated on the postage for an item some time ago that more than makes up for this mistake.
Tupperware Bread Keeper sold on eBay for $15.50
Getting to the bottom of my to do list. It wasn’t a big one but it always feels good to get commitments our of the way. Having my chores out of the way early makes me feel that everything else I get done is a bonus. I have a busy week ahead so it is good to get a jump start.
Mini Mission Monday is about finding ten minutes a day to declutter. To make it easy for you, each Monday I set seven declutter missions, one for each day of the week for you to follow. It takes the guess work out of decluttering and makes it easy and “fun” for you to achieve some quick decluttering.
This weeks mini missions are designed to help you plan to declutter. For those of you who just can’t seem to find the time, don’t know what to do when you have the time or just forget what it was you thought about doing when the time is available. Now you might be thinking “what a pile of gobbledy gook that was” but trust me I have fallen into this trap many a time myself. Here’s what I mean.
Lets say you are cleaning the house on Monday and notice an area that needs a little delcuttering but the mission for that day is to clean house and not be distracted by other tasks. So you continue on in your quest to have a clean home. Tuesday arrives and you have a little time up your sleeve and you think “Now what was that declutter task I was meaning to do that I discovered yesterday?”. The next thing you know your spare time has evaporated into thin air and you haven’t achieved anything because you couldn’t remember what it was you meant to do.
Just as easily you can be cruising along in your day and find a small pocket of time to declutter but you can’t think of a little declutter job just right for the amount of time you have to do it in. You can think of big tasks but you don’t have enough time for that right now, nor do you have enough time to plan how you can tackle that big tast in smaller steps. So as a result of this confusion, again, nothing gets done.
Never fear I have a solution and that is to plan ahead. This weeks mini missions are a set of steps to teach you how to do just that. So lets get started.
Monday – Get yourself a note pad, preferably one that is sitting around unused in your home. Go for a wonder around the house and find a few areas, big and small, that need decluttering and write them down in your trusty note book.
Tuesday – Now choose one of the larger items on your list and break it down into smaller sections that are doable in ten minutes. For example, perhaps you want to clean out your closet ~ maybe you will break it down into 1. Sort unwanted items from hanging clothes (or a fraction there of). 2. Sort through one drawer. 3. Sort another drawer. 4 Pull out items from closet floor, sort & return keepers (maybe you will even break this step down into more than one session)…
Wednesday – When you find you have a pocket of free time get started on the first part of each task you have set for yourself. The object of the task is to be able to walk away with the area not being a complete shambles with the decluttered items neatly paced in their donate and sell piles or thrown in the trash depending on their condition.
Thursday – Once again, when you have a pocket of time, carry on with where you left off the day before.
Friday – Today you might have a larger amount of time and can tackle a complete smaller task or else continue on with the one you have begun.
Saturday – By now you will be able to appreciate the steady progress you are making and the fact that just small pockets of time each day can make a difference and propel you in the direction of a decluttered home. The week-end is a good time to discuss, with the other members of your household, what is to be done with items that have surfaced that do not belong to you but you feel may need decluttering. Remember only your clutter is yours to do with what you will, others should be able to have the last say about their clutter. Do this today if you have found any such items during your daily missions.
Sunday – Break down the other big tasks on your list for when you run out of the small tasks you have already planned. Keep your notebook handy at all times so that from now on, when you come across and area or a thing that needs decluttering, you will be able to make a note of it for the next time you have ten minutes up your sleeve.
Last week while taking photos of an item I was decluttering, Liam brought out to me a bunch of old T-shirts he had just decluttered from his closet. Liam has his own distinct style and there is really no point in me or anyone else thinking they can buy him an item of clothing that will suit that style. As a result most of the T-shirts in this pile are ones he has never worn. It is a shame but it is a lesson I have learned and won’t make the same mistake again. These will go to the thrift shop and no doubt will be snapped up very quickly.
A day of sunshine at last. I was starting to get webbed feet and cabin fever. We had a lovely walk on the hills above the ocean followed by a cup of coffee at our favourite independent cafe.
I am sure you all know what it is like. You buy one electronic gadget and then it dies or becomes out of date. A new one takes it’s place but all those cables look so useful and you never know, you might need them some day. Before you know it there is more than one drawer or box in your home that looks like a snake pit. Of couse these snakes (cables) are all in hibernation just waiting for the right time to imerge into life.
Photo credit Offbeat Earth
Well, guess what? 99% of the time you will never use them again. My husband decided to take the chance that this is right and did the big cable round up in our house. and here is the result.
The round up in progress
The cables that got the chop and were sent to the thrift store.
As you know I enjoy and answer all the comments directed to me here at 365 Less Thing but each week I choose five to share with you that I don’t want you to miss and below are this week’s five.
I had to include this comment from Katharine this week and add my heartfelt congratulations.
Dianne had a sad story to tell in her comment in response to my post Sharing the wisdom of experience. I so very much appreciate readers sharing their stories, happy or sad, because there are such important lessons to be learned from them.
Angle Kay shows she is really “getting it” with this comment about how she is learning to separate from sentimental objects.
In this comment Donna reminds me of a hint I often use when deciding whether to list an item on ebay that I forgot to include in mt post. Thanks for the reminder Donna.
Ornela shows how she is doing a fine job or combining slow and bulk decluttering and finding new homes for the things she is decluttering in this comment.
And of course every week I weed out five blog post/articles from web sites to share with you that I found informative and below are my favourite for this week. Happy reading.
www.littleheroes.com ~ Be cautious about giving too much
Red Lotus letter ~Â Feng shui and-clutter how an overstuffed home robs you of vitality…
Becoming Minimalist ~ Encouragement for your first step towards living with less
The Healthy Living Lounge ~ The emotional cost of clutter
A Fresh Space ~ Embrace your clutter release the guiltÂ
I am not sure why I haven’t rid myself of these containers sooner. Actually I have three more in a smaller size and I dislike them just as much. I don’t see the point of microwave containers that can’t handle heating on high in the microwave without causing the lids to stop fitting properly. When I bought these containers I was told that they are designed to heat food not cook food and so I have never cooked food in them. When I tried to get them replaced under warranty I was told I had mistreated them because I had heated them on high. I am not impressed considering I was not informed about this subtle difference in instruction. Adding to my discontent is the fact that they cost about three times as much as the inexpensive containers I also use that seem to have survived my “mistreatment” quite well. Strangely enough Tupperware have redesigned these containers in the years since I bought mine which says to me that they weren’t a good design in the first place. Needless to say I am left feeling bitter and twisted considering what a good customer I have been over the years and I assure you I will never buy another Tupperware brand container ever again.
Tupperware that left me bitter & twistedÂ
I had a fun time today for my first day volunteering at my local thrift store. The staff were friendly, it was really busy and I wasn’t the only newbie. I spent my time processing clothes and was happy that there were only a few items that were unsellable out of the seven of so big bags that I emptied, tagged, priced and hung. I think I am going to enjoy this new experience and I will keep you all informed about how it goes. Oh! And I only stabbed myself in the finger twice with the tagging gun.
I was intending to write a post today about disassociating with your clutter emotionally but once I started to think about this issue I decided it deserved a whole series of posts. So I have divided this subject into catergories such as Sentimental, Guilt, Obligational, Aspirational and Security clutter as each one affects people in different ways.
Decluttering isn’t just a physical activity, in fact the metal strain of letting go of certain items is where the real challenge comes in for many people. For others letting go can be quite easy, in fact too easy in some cases, learning not to reclutter is their biggest challenge but that is a whole other post topic. For now we will concentrate of finding the will to let go.
Today we will start with guilt Clutter and I will do my best to describe this kind of clutter, explain our attachment to it and to help you find a way to disassociate from not only the items but whatever it is that binds you to it.
Guilt clutter are items you regret having acquiring in the first place but now feel you should keep in order to justify their purchase and/or get your money’s worth out of them. Just about anything can fall into this category but they are usually items that you…
Some of these purchases are aspirational in character such as that fishing boat that sits in the back yard out in the weather unused week in week out, decreasing in resale value everyday. You had good intensions when you bought it but really didn’t put enough thought into it. Your wife doesn’t like fishing that much and the kids aren’t as keen as you thought they would be because they have their own intests. You soon discovered that fishing isn’t that much fun alone and launching the boat can be a challenge on your own also. Fishing really was more fun that odd weekend that your mate Bill would take you out in his boat.
Other purchases come in the form of bandaids to mask disappointment, insecurities or other feeling of dissatisfaction that occur in life. Like that new handbag you bought to compensate for the fact that you hate your job ~ That new dress you bought so you could feel better about yourself even though what you really want is to loose 20lbs ~ The diamond ring you treated yourself to because you husband doesn’t pay enough attention to you any more. Once the novelty wears off these items you are back at the store looking for another hit because you still have that crappy job, the excess weight and the unappreciative husband and now also some very unhealthy credit card debt and a cluttered home.
Sometimes purchases can just be an honest mistake. Say for instance you need a new appliance in the home and you make what you think is a considered purchase and it turns out not to be what really suits your needs. You though you had all the information you needed to make a good choice but six months down the track you are sorry you ever laid eyes on this thing. You couldn’t live your choice any longer and bought a replacement and now that other reject is sitting in your garage taunting you every time you see it.
There are many more stories behind why we purchase these items of guilt but the fact is that is does no good to keep them in our homes if they aren’t being used. They are never going to realise their worth and it is best to cut your losses now and try to sell them on to someone who may appreciate them more. You may only get back a fraction that you paid for them but that is better than wallowing in regret. The grief they are giving you far outweighs the joy they every gave you and it is time to move on.
What is important here is to learn from your mistake/s. Should you make a habit of this vicious cycle then you are really in trouble but if you realise the error of your ways and address the issues that inspire these kinds of purchases instead of running away from them then you will be on your way to recovery.
So if you have any items in your home that you feel may fall under the category of Guilt Clutter it is time to disassociate from them. Take a long hard look at these items and …
Now use whatever method suits you to remove this object from you life, whether that be to recoup some of you losses or donate it to charity as penance for your transgressions but either way let it go.
I think I have finally come to the last of the craft adhesive applicators to be decluttered from my extensive craft supplies collection. Out of curiosity I scanned back to see how many time adhesive has been the declutter item of the day and found six other occasions.
Craft Adhesive
I am grateful that my thrift store has opened at its new location and that the rain (deluge) held off long enough to drop off a trunk load of donations. While I was there I asked if they needed volunteers and as a result tomorrow I will probably be processing my own donations since I will be doing the afternoon shift. That is one way to increase my knowledge of what happens behind the scene at thrift stores. I will be sure and let you all know how it went.
While we advocate slow and steady decluttering at 365lessthings, sometimes that’s just not what happens. Sometimes the Big Power Cleaning is in order. You have the help of your husband, friend, child, or you’re just sick and tired of being sick and tired. It is time to get it done! But how to best proceed?
I love the local bulk waste pick up days our local council puts on every six months or so. It is a great time to get rid of stuff that is just junk but too big to put in the wheelie bin. I also love that people come along and sort through the junk and sometimes take pieces to be recycled. This time around Liam cleaned out a bunch of his old art stuff from the garage.
Liam's junk on bulk collection day.
I am grateful that the sun shone long enough yesterday to get my washing mostly dry. It started to get a little overcast as the afternoon wore on but it did it stayed dry and I only had to put a few things in the drying for a short tumble.Â
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