I have written, more than once, about clutter categories on my blog. Categories such as obligation clutter, sentimental clutter, lazy clutter, guilt clutter… One category I have written about before but am not sure I have ever labelled is Life Circle Clutter.
I have been reminded by recent events that people usually have their own particular clutter weakness or weaknesses. I have also noticed that these weaknesses may involve not accepting that a certain phase of ones life is now in the past.
For example, are you reluctance to let go of the fact that there are no longer young children permanently in your life. Does your home have enough kiddy items ~ toys particularly ~ to cater to more than one small child living there permanently. While in fact children only visit their once or twice a year with the occasional half hour visit from neighbours’ children.
Do you have enough kitchen items, linen, and rooms to cater for a large family while there is only two of you left in the home. Do you know someone who is reluctant to part with a shed full of tools that even they admit are rarely, if ever, used.
This is not simply a case of “I might need it someday.†but more of a reluctance to let go of the past and be realistic about who and what one is in the here and now.
I am not talking about being reluctant to part with items of past interest that one is still able and likely to return to. This is a case of being resistant to the circle of life. There comes a time when we simply pass through phases that are never to return and it can be very sad if we can’t accept that. Life is all about change. Change isn’t a bad thing it is simply inevitable. That doesn’t mean that you can’t still enjoy these things it just means you don’t have to cater to them 24/7. A bucket of toys for visiting children, a realistic number of items to cater for the occasional guest and enough tools for the odd jobs you still perform around the home…
Enjoy the happy memories, revel in your new circumstances and make the most of life no matter what phase of it you are in. And, of course, let go of those excess things that are now of little or no use to you.
Today’s Mini Mission
Let go of some grown children clutter ~ This is something long ago left behind by your grown child. Your home is not a storage unit, ask them to collect it and let them know you are going to get rid of it otherwise. With a little diplomacy this is possible without alienating them.
Eco Tip for the Day
Check the water flow of your shower (litres per minute). If it uses more than 9 litres per minute I would suggest you buy a new water saving shower head. Some go as low as 7.5 litres per minute.
To test the shower run it on full blast for 10 seconds. It should use no more than 1.5 litres in that time.
For a full list of my eco tips so far click here
It matters not how fast I go, I hurry faster when I’m slow
Tracey says
I have a rotivator story. We borrowed a rotivator from my father-in-law over 20 years ago. It lives in our shed. We tried to use it during the redesign of our garden, but got a man in with a machine in the end. We covered the soil with weedproof fabric and planted shrubs through that. The garden is now very well established. So the conversation goes:
“Are we ever going to use that rotivator again?” “Probably not”, he says . Me: ” Can we get rid of it?” Him: “No it’s my dad’s”. Me: “Can we give it back to him?” Him: “No, he won’t use it, he’s 84”. Me banging my head on the nearest wall, “Are we going to use it?”
Perhaps I have sown a seed but I think it has failed to germinate!!
Moni says
Tracey – you made me laugh. Yes I have encountered those sort of situations too.
Colleen Madsen says
Hi Tracey, I very much sympathise with your situation. I have done a little head banging myself over the last couple of weeks. Lets just hope that seed has been well planted and he is fertilising it in his head. Seed planting is a good place to start.
Wendy B says
Tracey, maybe you could ask Dad what he’d like you to do with it. He’ll probably say, get rid of it! And then you can do so, guilt free.
Jane W says
It’s funny timing for this article for me as this was my declutter last week – we must think alike! Here’s my past-life declutter:
I came to the realisation that the box of jewellery making kit under the bed had to go. The thought that made me take action was when I realised I don’t even wear jewellery any more, so the chances of me wanting to make any…..nil. It was just going to sit there forever and gather dust. I put it up for sale online and received £25 for it a few days later. It was a fun hobby while it lasted, but having a whole box of beads and pliers etc. is silly when you don’t even wear jewellery.
Colleen Madsen says
Hi Jane W, good move. I must admit this comment will probably inspire me to let go of a little more of my beading supplies. I do still dabble in mine but the balance between how much I have and how much I dabble is a long way from equal.
Deb J says
Ah yes! This, Colleen, is what we are dealing with here for the most part. Mom is really, really struggling with the limitations she now has and the tasks that means she no longer can do. Most of what is left in the house that we could declutter belongs to the Life Circle Clutter category. I’m not pushing. It has taken me a long time to deal with that myself and with the things I have done over the years to help me deal with the changes.
Colleen Madsen says
Hi Deb J, you are doing the right thing. Like Tracey has done all you can do is plant the seed of thought and hope that it will grow. Your mom has come around to plenty of other realisations so I am sure she will continue to accept others. For some it is just harder to admit that the past is in the past and one must accept themselves for who and what they are now when that reality is simply never going to change. Forcing the issue will only lead to tears.
Deb J says
Yes, I know mom will eventually come around.
Angel says
My mom really deals with this issue and it causes her to get really defensive if I bring it up. She at one point owned 13 of the 9×13 pans to bake with(I think she has given away to family three of the pans so she is now down to 10). They were mostly from my grandmother when she passed but my grandma owned a restaurant and then a food truck and then a bed and breakfast. It made sense for her to have so many since she used them weekly. My mom’s reasoning is that when everyone is visiting(25 of us total) then she will have enough to make food in. Since that rarely happens, and throw away pans are always an option and not too expensive, how do you talk to a parent about letting things go? She also has about 40 plates too for family visiting that remain in her cupboard at all times, not just visiting family times. And she has multiple closets of clothes that she can’t get rid of since she is losing weight. She has lost 40 lbs this year. She has kept all the clothes she had from before the weight loss and then she has closets full of other things that she just holds on to since she may be that size again. She gets so defensive about letting things. She owns clothes from 30 yrs ago. Is it worth bringing it up at all anymore or should I just ignore it and let her live her life the way it is? I just get excited about how freeing it is to declutter that I want to share that but I know we are all on our own pace in life. I just see it really being an area that is holding her back from relaxing.
Ideealistin says
Hi Angel, i’d say: Tell her about your revelations and changes and maybe drop a hint here and there but don’t try to Change her. The idea of decluttering is Slowly catching on with my Mother but we had Fights I wish we hadn’t because in my enthusiasm I was as pushy As She was stubborn. I Fully understand how you See the connection of clutter and stress and want to help. i see the Same with my mum and it Drives me crazy. But some of my good intentions surely backfired and made her Allergic to the whole topic for a while.
Colleen Madsen says
The answer to “…how do you talk to a parent about letting things go?” us gently. As we have already mentioned in earlier comments planting the seed of thought, making gentle suggestions and allow them to germinate in someones mind is the best place to start. If nothing happens after a reasonable period of time revisit the conversation adding some extra rationality to the subject. A lifetime of habit is not easily let go of for some people but the power of suggestion will often do its magic over time. They get used to the idea if they hear it ofter enough.
You are right, she may never enjoy the freedom from stuff that you are experiencing. It just can’t be forced, one has to be willing to comply. Just continue to make suggestions without judgement and you may have success one day. Don’t forget that some people think we are the crazy ones for not wanting to be surrounded with stuff or have no desire to acquire it.
Deb J says
Angel, try to back off and not say anything. If she brings it up then you can gently explain how you feel about what YOU did. If she comes to your home and mentions anything that gives you an opening gently explain what you have done. Don’t ever make it sound like you are pushing her to do the same. She will see it as criticism or something. It’s hard but sometimes it will open up eventually.
Melissa says
I think my life circle clutter could also be categorized as lazy clutter. I just simply haven’t made the time to go through my shelf of stuff from Grad school. I certainly don’t regret that this time in my life has moved on, I just know what a time consuming task this one is going to be and haven’t gotten around to starting it yet. Going through folders of paper is my least favorite chore. I’ve made mention of this shelf before. I haven’t started it yet though. I know I just need to start. Even if it’s just 15 minutes at a time. Even though it’s smaller in size, it’s a bigger job than the shelf I tackled a few weeks ago due to the type of stuff that is on it. Evenings after work seem to go so quickly though!
Moni says
Melissa – I was just telling Michelle further down that I have been shredding old financial records, I don’t know if it will help you or not, but I made a deal with myself that I could buy myself a new jersey for Winter when it was done. Now I know I could have just gone into the shop and bought myself a jersey any time I wanted, but for some reason I was able to fool that part of my brain with this bargain ie a reward when it was all done, and it worked. Maybe you could attach some sort of reward to tackling this job?
Melissa says
Rewards are a good idea. I think I self sabatoge this effort as I only think about doing it when I absolutely know I can’t get to it because every minute is already claimed by higher priority tasks. A simplification of yesterday was work, weekly dinner visit with my inlaws, bed. Today it is work, yoga, dinner, dye my husband’s hair, bed. So since all of my time was tied up it’s a ‘safe’ time to think about that shelf since I can’t get to it. lol. I need to work on thinking about it on days when every minute isn’t already claimed. Not sure if a reward will help me with that.
Colleen Madsen says
Melissa ~ Speaking from experience I would say that while that shelf in still in the state it is in you will find someway to make sure every day is full so you don’t have to deal with it. The eBook I am trying to write is suffering the same fate. The more words I add the harder it is to keep it all straight in my head so I avoid it.
Melissa says
I don’t know, I just really do have full days most of the time. I have dumped one shelf from the case all over my bed so it’s in my plan today to deal with it when I get home from work. So today is full too, it’s just full with getting around to this chore finally. 🙂
Melissa says
Well after yesterday’s dump out of the shelf it is in better shape. Even after the hour and a half I spent on it that one shelf is not finished. This is a huge job. It’s progress though and that’s all I ever aim for. In addition to housing all kinds of stuff from grad school, it has also become a catch all for cards that I’ve received over the past 4 years or so. This morning I took the time to read some of them and about half of the ones I got to have been placed on the kitchen table for my husband to look over and then to be placed in the recycler. Tonight after work I have a doctor appointment on the other side of town that will probably make me very late in getting home so I doubt much more will be done on it tonight. I can probably read a few more cards tomorrow morning over breakfast though. 🙂
Angel says
Melissa, not sure if this will help you or not, but about reading through all the cards. Maybe you can take a batch with you to your appts and sit and read through them as you wait. That way you are not tied down to only reading them when you have the time at home. Another thought would be to place them in a small container by your sitting area and then if you watch tv, read through a few during commercials each time. The important thing would be to make a plan to have them read through by the end of the week(or other time line that works for you) otherwise you are just transferring your clutter to another area 🙂
Melissa says
I should have some time on Wednesday afterwork so I think to force myself to get working on that shelf I may just empty the whole thing (or at least one shelf) onto my bed before I leave for work in the morning. Then I can’t very well ignore it or spend time on anything else instead when I get home! lol.
Moni says
Melissa – that is the other idea I would have done – I call it the “Hurricane Method” – destruction and mayhem! I am cautious to recommend this method as it isn’t in line with one thing a day and it generates a fair bit of stress but it does get the job done in a short period of time. Maybe you could just dump one area onto your bed?
Colleen Madsen says
Good advice Moni. Dump it on the bed so you have to deal with it before you can go to bed.
Melissa says
Okay, one shelf has been dumped all over my bed! aghhh! lol. Actually, it isn’t causing me stress. If anything I’m happy to know it’s in my plan for today to deal with the one shelf from the case when I get home. I even spent about ten minutes before I left for work looking over what’s on the bed and about ten items went right in the trash.
Colleen Madsen says
Well done Melissa and happy decluttering.
Colleen Madsen says
I can understand your reluctance. I have barely started to tackle the photo collection that I have talked about here from way back at the start of my declutter mission. I have focused instead of getting rid of all the other stuff. Now the photos are about all that is left. The difficulty factor for me isn’t the size of the task but the difficulty factors. Sifting through them all, working out the best way to categorise and store them. But more than that it is that the choice of what the keep and what to discard is not mine alone. This can be a real stumbling block which is why am approaching it slowly. Every now and again I make suggestions on what I thing should go of the ones that are not mine. Sometimes I am successful and sometimes I meet resistance. I find it best the spread the aggravation out over a long period because even though I don’t insist, only suggest, it isn’t always met with a similar patient response. I am the less sentimental one and I have come to know when to back off. Because there is so much stuff already gone it is no big deal to tackle this area slowly.
Deb J says
Colleen, I understand this one. I had it for years. Then one day I pulled out a bunch of photos that my aunt had sent and was going to put them in the “Family” storage album and Mom said “You know we need to get rid of a bunch of that stuff.” When all was over we had consolidated 5 albums to one. I was happy dancing.
Moni says
Colleen – yes, I have also put photos aside – and what is more, I had all the negatives digitally scanned so that we have them all on hard drive now, but I’ve not felt at peace with the item of destroying the originals, well, not yet anyway. I’m not sure if it was Dizzy or Jane, but one of them had no problem with hiffing the original photos once they were scanned/digitised, so I’m not sure what my reluctance is.
Like you, I’ve decided to deal with that one last. Plus, family movies. I did get all of our videos transferred to DVD but I do need to do or arrange for them to be edited, but that will be quite time consuming and as the box they sit in is quite compact I’m working on getting bigger and comparitively easier stuff out the door.
RebeccaJ says
I made a big photo mess on our dining room table for a week when going through the photos. The annoyance of the mess motivated me to make a big effort to finish that project quickly. At some point in the future I should do a second pass to weed down the photos further, then digitize them.
Michelle says
My mom spent Saturday from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m. shredding old financial documents for accounts she no longer has and it’s been eight years since these accounts were active. Way to go, Mom!!
Moni says
Michelle – I have been shredding our ‘out of obligation to keep’ records too. My hubby felt I should just pay a document destruction company but I felt there wasn’t that many – only about 10 ringbinders worth – and I could do one ringbinder a night spread over a couple of weeks. The cats didn’t like the noise, actually I don’t think my hubby liked the noise either but it was quite interesting seeing information from 8 years ago. All I can say is “yay for digital archiving” which I started doing about 3 years ago.
Deb J says
WooHoo!! Happy dancing with you.
Michelle says
I could stand to do another file shredding event myself, but I’m really proud of Mom for getting through all that mess. She said she was going to create proper files for some of the more important documents. I think that will be great!
Colleen Madsen says
Yes, way to go Mom!! Now encourage her to do this on a regular basis and she will never have to tackle such a large task again.
Michelle says
Hi Colleen – the best thing was that she found a document that was really critical at this point in her life. She is really understanding the importance of having everything labeled and in an organized, easy-to-find fashion and I am very appreciative of her good, hard work. 🙂
Moni says
Life Circle Clutter. I like it. It is so true that we drift out of a stage of life and into another, sometimes without even noticing it and just like that an item falls into the ‘not used’ category.
I have a few such items to discuss with my kids over the weekend – the Play Station 2 with the dozen or so Sing Star disks is one of them.
Colleen Madsen says
Hi Moni, good luck with your mission. There is no doubt that while kids are around there is always Life Circle decluttering to attend to. So many huge life circle events have and are taking place for me this year. Liam has flown the coupe and now Bridget has also all but moved into her new home. Who knows what is next.
Moni says
Colleen – as much as I enjoy my kids, I do find myself looking ahead to a time when it will be just Adrian and I and we can think about down sizing and not seeing our income split quite so many ways.
There are a number of things that the kids have hung onto that they would never miss if they just disappeared. However, at the time these were the things that they didn’t want to get rid of and I won’t be just snatching them and hiffing them out, however, I think its time to see if they still feel as strongly about them now. Who knows? Everytime I re-visit an area something that survived the last cull gets decluttered (and ironically, it will be an item that I was adamant could NOT be gotten rid of) and so possibly if the kids are made to re-visit their “keep” items a couple of times a year they might do the same. As parents we tend to take their initial decision to keep as gospel for eternity and then are surprised down the track when we get a “that old thing? should have gotten rid of it long ago” reaction.
Angel says
I have experienced the same thing when it comes to going back to an area to declutter more. Something that I had no intention of ever getting rid of seems to not be as important anymore. I don’t know if it is because before the area was so cluttered before that I “had to keep something” to not get that “empty” feeling that I sometimes feel. Sometimes decluttering creates a freeing feeling and other times an emptiness that seems like I need something to fill it. Either way, when I go back to an area after its been a few weeks or even months, I can see the space with new eyes and it allows me to remove something else.
Colleen Madsen says
Moni ~ I have found the same thing myself. So many things have gone out the door that I never thought would. There is very little stuff that I have soul choice over left now so I need cooperation on decluttering them. I will pick my battles though.
Jen says
Great post today, life circle clutter. It does not take long for life to move on, and as well, we should move along with it. It is so hard to admit when one stage of life has come and gone because it means that we are getting older but it is the natural progression of things. Most of clutter falls into some category of life circle clutter I think. Especially the kind that we do not want to part with or let go of. For instance, letting go of items that belong to my children at certain stages. Luckily, my children are really great with knowing what they want to keep or let go of.
Colleen Madsen says
Hi Jen, I think childhood memory clutter is one thing that is hard for most mothers to part with. Like you I have always asked the kids if they want it and if they don’t then I don’t need it either.
Nana says
I started going through sewing supplies last week and it had become so messy just decided to go ahead and go through all the stuff in the guest room closet. Ended up for donation: another wool blanket, 2 wool skirts, a vest, 3 sewing materials (at least 3 yards in each), Now I need to look at my other yardage materials and see if there are others I can never imagine me or my granddaughter using. At one time I had planned to quilt, but arthritis in my hands and lack of time took care of that aspiration. So there is sure be some of that still around. This made the second big bag for the thrift store since I still had two pairs of shoes I never wore and decided it was past time for them to go along with some other items. They are loaded up and ready for the next trip to town. It is a rainy week so plan to do some more this week as I have time. We had trimmed the toys for grandchildren down to 4 or 5 items since only two are still preteen.
Colleen Madsen says
Well done Nana. My mother-in-law has also been decluttering material lately. She found a little retro shop that will buy the stuff from her so she is making space and cash. Yay for her.
Maggie says
Thursday, the Salvation Army truck will be at my house picking up some clothes and household items. I spent the weekend searching my closet for things to donate. I found a boot and a special shoe from when I had a broken foot. It has been in the closet for over 10 years so think I can finally donate it to someone else. Also, a winter coat or two and some baskets. Yes, the baskets will make the cut this time. There are three that are going and perhaps more if I can get moving tomorrow evening. I have been working late and haven’t had time to do as much as I wanted but still, 3 bags and 2 boxes. Even my husband is happy. I also mailed another box of books to my friend in Kansas and finally, Deb J, I have 6 puzzles headed your way tomorrow. They are in my trunk and I plan on mailing them tomorrow. While I can’t see a lot of progress, I know that the closets are getting cleaned out. Once they are done, I’ll start on the more visible things in the living room and dining room.
Deb J says
Maggie, it sounds like you are progressing. I love when I can see things happening like having a Salvation Army truck picking up a delivery. Looking forward to the puzzles.
Becky says
My Life Circle Clutter hasn’t been due to my reluctance, but to my grandchildren’s.
I’d mentioned that we had no need of the stack of coloring books that were always here for them, but they didn’t want me to get rid of them.
I decided one day a couple of weeks ago that, since they are all teens now, nobody is REALLY going to color in a coloring book, and I recycled them all.
If my grandchildren *do* want to make some artwork when they visit us, I certainly have enough “grown up” art supplies that they can use.
Marianne says
I have a question for you. My daughter has an afghan that a relative made her when she was born. She has never used it and doesn’t want it. She is a teenager now and I don’t know if someday she will wish she had it. I am happy to get rid of it, but I am trying not to impose my values on her. I personally don’t like afghans so I have never used it for her when she was young. But, will the day come in the future that she will wish she had it? I have the same problem with my husband’s afghan that his mom made him in high school. He has never used it and we have dragged it from place to place for the past 20 years. He isn’t interested in keeping it, since we don’t ever use afghans, but do you think he will wish he had it when she dies? I think I feel a little guilt since I have wanted to get rid of it all along. Would you get rid of something a mom or grandma made if it was never used? Sometimes I worry that they will ask if we have it still. I hate to have her spend all the time making it and not use it, but we really don’t like afghans. My kids like quilts instead. Once when I was asked what colors to make one of my children’s afghan’s, I said that they liked quilts better. That one child got a quilt. Then she never asked again and we are back to afghans. It is so easy for me to get rid of my own things. What’s you take on this in your experience?
Moni says
Marianne – I would get rid of the afghan. I do not forsee afghans becoming the fashionable must-have item for young adults and if by some bizarre twist of fate they do, it will be an early 90’s version and not likely to be fashionable. Likewise the one your MIL made your husband.
The recipients don’t want them and sound quite happy to not hold onto them. It sounds to me that you are trying to do the right thing by everyone else and that is admirable but it was an unwanted gift, so pass it on to someone who will want it or will use it. Red Cross maybe?
Yes I would get rid of something grandma gave and I didn’t like it, though I’d probably wouldn’t let her know that I’d given it away and IF grandma ever actually outright asked I’d bluff my way thru, even if I had to be liberal with the truth.
Sanna says
Haha, Moni, I’d love to have an afghan. Actually that was what we asked for when granny moved to a nursing home – but, our family didn’t realize that was what we wanted and we ended up with none. I do like colorful crocheted afghans.
That said, I’d give away the one of the husband if he wants it gone (which apparently he does), as he is grown up and will know that it was his own decision and his own “fault” if it was gone. Actually it probably doesn’t hold that many dear memories, although handmade, as he never liked and used it. There might be different things he can keep as a keepsake and really cherish, should his mother die.
The one of the daughter though, I’d keep and give to her when she moves out (or at about 18-20years). If she gets rid of it, fine. If she finds she has a use for it when she moves to student living or actually comes to like it, she will have it there. Tastes can change during growing up.
I do think though that it wouldn’t be that bad to let her get rid of it now as well. It is her afghan after all and she is probably capable of chosing herself.
Anyways, as with your husband: I think one sentimentally clings more to things one has always liked. Like the afghan your granny always had put on her sofa and with which you have memories of books being read to you or eating scones and drinking tea, not the afghan that she maybe made as well but that always had been tucked away in some box because noone ever liked it in the first place. This second one will just have the chance of becoming liked due to changes in taste or fashion, but not as a sentimental item, I guess.
Maggie says
Marianne, We had a similar problem. My husband’s mom made our kids an afghan each and one for my husband. They were scratchy but the kids put them on their beds over their bedspreads and used them to sit on in the living room when they watched tv. Once they were grown, we put them in the dog’s bed or on the sofa for the dog to sleep on. My mother in law loved our dachshund so was not upset that the dog slept on it. I’m not sure where they are now because the dog is gone. I probably gave them away or put them in the basement for use outside for picnics. My husband’s is in the basement – very scratchy and I can’t stand to even touch it – but he is saying that it will soon be a give-away because he doesn’t like it anymore. (Guess he is waiting for me to finish the quilt I started for him) My MIL is deceased now and we can do what we want with them and no one will be hurt. If I were you, I’d do what I want with them. If you don’t like them, someone else will surely want and love them if you give them to a charity.
Marianne says
Thanks for your replies. Any guilt I felt is gone.
MomToBostonTerriers says
Life Cycle Clutter is an interesting topic for me right now. My father passed away 5 weeks ago at the age of 92. He had lived in the same house for 32 years. I spent a month with Mom after the funeral helping her donate some of Dad’s personal possessions. I walked through the three-car garage and looked at three decades of Life Cycle Clutter: hand tools and power tools, hunting equipment, fishing rods and related equipment, supplies for tying fishing flies, and a huge collection of handmade fishing flies. Dad had not used any of those items for at least 20 years. He continued gardening so the huge collection of gardening equipment and fertilizers was still in use. I have no idea how us children will deal with all of this.
This started me thinking about how I, personally, will deal with my own Life Cycle Clutter. It seems to me the problem is admitting one’s physical limitations as one ages, and who wants to do that?! Alternately, by the time a person realizes he/she cannot physically enjoy certain hobbies or interests any longer, the individual might no longer have the physical and mental ability to dispose of those items.
My husband and I do not have children, so I want to take care of my own affairs for as long as I can. Do you and the other readers have advice for how to approach this huge issue? I’d like to establish some type of standard for myself, so I will recognize when it is time to let go of things while I still have the ability to handle that task.
Moni says
MomToBostonTerriers – first of all I am sorry to hear that your father passed away.
Secondly I can highly recommend staying on board with 365 Less Things for daily reminders and challenges, I bumbled along for a while trying to declutter but I didn’t ‘get’ that stored clutter is still clutter and my focus was on skimming off the top of our clutter and spending time and money on plastic bins and finding more and more creative ways to continue to stuff more and more into our lives.
Last year my 16 year old daughter had a friend lose his estranged father – unfortunately he was his father’s only living relative and the burden fell to him and his mum to sort out a very full house. Because his father lived at the other end of the country, he couldn’t even call on friends to help. This taught my daughter a valuable lesson on possessions – not having an over abundance – and being considerate to anyone left behind, so she’s been my helper ever since.
I can say that colleen’s method of one thing every day is a sure and steady method, but if you ever need to make big inroads, this is definately the place for support, encouragement and ideas.
Colleen Madsen says
Hi MomToBostonTerriers, I would also like to extend my sympathy to you and your family on the loss of your loved one.
There is no special advice on this subject all you have to do is stay in touch with your own abilities. Be prepared to admit when something is no longer of interest to you and/or you aren’t capable and willing to perform certain tasks and just let the items go that are required. I am only 48 and I can safely say that there is nothing in my home already that I don’t use or love and very little of it is stuff that is simply loved. I am a very practical person so I find useful items more valuable that nicknacks. And I like the style of my furniture and we have a few nice art pieces and that satisfies my desire for beautiful things.
Mark Adam Douglass (Minimalist Couple) says
I know in the past I have struggled greatly with phases of life. For example, it took me a long time to get rid of my university stuff.
As a multipotentialite, I have had multiple careers as such, and whilst letting go of almost all of the stuff from some careers, like magic, was relatively easy, letting go of my juggling stuff is proving very difficult, but maybe that means I have more juggling in me, just presented in a different form. I am unsure, but I am working through it.
Thanks for your great thoughts. You always get me thinking 🙂