As I am on vacation in New Zealand for some time I will be republishing old posts from the archives to keep you all entertained and motivated while I am busy. I hope you will enjoy the post I have dug up for you today and that it inspires you to have at it and get some decluttering done.

How much time do you waste in your day then profess to have no time to get your house in order. No time to begin decluttering that stuff that is making it difficult to keep your house in order.

We are all entitled to downtime. I am not going to argue that fact. The question is has your downtime taken over. And do you actually feel better or worse for it. I know that when I have been sitting idle for too long not doing anything useful I start getting agitated and feel the need to get up and make myself useful. I think it is a guilt feeling from being slothful. Once again I am not talking about rest time I am talking about wasted time when enough rest has already been had.

As this weeks mini missions show it isn’t hard to find a little time every now and again to fit in a little delcuttering or perhaps you could even use the time to do some much needed quick tasks around your house. In the time it takes to boil the kettle and brew the tea I can manage to empty the dishwasher. During add times on television I can put away the folded washing. The washing itself can be folding while watching television, as can ironing, sorting papers, doing a decluttering of your jewellery box or make-up kit. You can even pull out a drawer, bring it into the living room and declutter while watching your favourite show. You can clean the rubbish out of your handbag while waiting for an appointment. There is sure to be a rubbish bin close by to throw the trash into. And with a little imagination you can find many periods where time can be better used.

This morning I was feeling listless so I did the ironing. I felt much better for it. This evening while my husband was watching a movie, I wasn’t that interested in, I did some reorganising and a little decluttering in my craft room. I must admit I am a little “different” because I actually enjoy organising and decluttering so I wouldn’t consider this task a chore, but you get the idea. I enjoy the challenge, thinking outside the box and, of course, the end result. And of course I enjoy my actual downtime when I take it, happy in the knowledge that I am keeping up with my household chores.

Lets go back to that ironing I mentioned. I don’t know anyone who enjoys ironing. I don’t have a lot of it and can easily ignore it in the laundry cupboard for weeks before clothing items are needed or my husband runs out of hankies. (Yes I iron the hankies, not linen, underwear, jeans or t-shirts though so please don’t judge.) When I say ignore, I mean the items that do require ironing won’t run down for a while. But one thing I hate worse than ironing is feeling like I have neglected a task until desperation sets in. Especially when I know that I have had plenty of opportunity to get on with the task sooner. It makes me feel lazy and inefficient which permeates my downtime.

I know from experience that many people feel a similar way about their lack of effort to declutter. They know they need to do it, that they want it done but can’t bring themselves to make the effort. And often their downtime is marred by that fact that they know this task is being neglected because the evidence of this is staring them right in the face. Goading them and nagging when they should be relaxed and tranquil. Hours and hours are wasted feeling far less than tranquil in the effort to avoid something that would take much less time to solve.

So don’t waste those spare minutes here and there where you can achieve more than you would expect. I have been following my own advice about this to the letter over for the last week and I have achieve things that have been waiting around for me to do for weeks if not months. Nothing that important but nevertheless things that have quietly been nagging me to get them done. Not only can I go on my vacation content with my achievements but when I get home I will be able to ease on into routine with

“If we do not feel grateful for what we already have, what makes us think we’d be happy with more?” — Unknown

It has been a busy week for me and I didn’t get around to writing a second post. So rather than leave you uninspired for the week I am republishing the following post from the archives. Enjoy!

* * * * * * *

Don’t Agonise Over Getting Rid Of Clutter

I had a reader back in the early days of my blog who seemed to have trouble letting go of her clutter. It wasn’t that she wanted to keep the stuff, or found it difficult to make the choices as to what to let go however she balked at getting on with the task. To me it was obvious that her problem was that she didn’t like seeing anything go to waste.

You see she was very eco friendly, to the point where it was a mission to throw nothing in the trash. And I think this noble goal interfered with her goal to rid her home of clutter. As you all know I am not a lover of waste myself and do what I can to refuse, reuse, reduce and recycle.  In a way I am pleased to say that 99.9% of what I have decluttered has been rehoused, reused, recycled or repurposed. Pleased, because I didn’t just have a house full of trash but sorry that I had so much useful-to-someone-else stuff sitting around unused for long periods of time.

And just because some things don’t work as they should doesn’t mean they aren’t useful to someone. Below are my suggestions on how to deal with such items.

The best way I found to pass on items that have faults is to list them on freecycle or local buy-swap-&-sell or similar web sites, utilise the curb side giveaway method or word of mouth. Explain the fault/s clearly and allow people to decide for themselves if they care or even possibly have the ability to repair them. Through the avenues mentioned above I decluttered all of the following items.

1. All the parts to my malfunctioning Kenwood mixer, then gave the mixer to the last guy who came along who was keen to dabble with it to see if he could get it working or use the parts.
2. The hutch section of a buffet and hutch to a guy who did cabinet making as a hobby. He had a use for the parts and wood while I had a use for the buffet. Everyone was happy. He even asked to let me know if I ever wanted to part with the matching coffee table. I eventually did and he paid me $40 for it.
3. I advertised a lamp, which was unwired, on freecycle and a lady took it with the hope that her electrician son would rewire it for her.
4. I put a trampoline on the street with a FREE sign on it. It needed some restitching but everything else about it was great. It disappeared quickly.
5. I gave an old vacuum cleaner, whose insulation was degrading and blowing out through the air vent, to a lady who was sure she could either clean it up or use the parts.
6. I sole an iRobot vacuum cleaner for parts on ebay.

And these were just the items I could remember in a hurry.

There is usually someone out there who can find a use for things, working or not. Should it not work out for them you will be non the wiser and be happy that you did your best to find a new home for the item. And the stuff that no one wants may just have to end up in the bin. Just remember it is just stuff after all and possibly not wise purchases in the first place. Let it go and learn from the experience. You will hopefully just be a bit more discerning about what to purchase in the future.  Some, on the other hand, are well used items that might just have come to the end of their usefulness and there is certainly no shame in throwing them away.

Today’s Mini Mission

Declutter your handbag so it is easy to find what you need in there when you need it.

“If we do not feel grateful for what we already have, what makes us think we’d be happy with more?” — Unknown

Deb J

I have discovered something about myself.  I read too much.  Yes, I really said that.  I definitely read too much.  I love to read and I am a very fast reader.  I read 2-3 books in an evening depending upon the length of the book.  I was pretty happy with the decluttering I have done over the years.  I used to have an extensive library.  I once sold enough books to pay for one semester of college.  While I never accumulated that many books again, I did have a bunch of books that I decluttered over the last few years.  Then I started using a Kindle and had over 1000 books on it.  I decluttered many of those and am decluttering more.  With all that, you would think I would be very happy with where things are today.  Then I realized I’m not happy at where I am.

I discovered I read too much.  How can I say that?  I have acquired the habit of reading the entire evening and into the early morning each day.  I need the relaxation and rest of being in my recliner.  It makes me able to go to bed and actually sleep because it helps my body have less pain.  I also like to have the quiet time once Mom is gone to bed and thus the reading into the early morning.  Unfortunately, reading so late is not good for my body and especially it is not good for my diabetes because it means I don’t have a good schedule like diabetes requires. 

What does this have to do with decluttering?  Sometimes decluttering requires ridding ourselves of more than “things”.  Decluttering often means ridding ourselves of or changing habits or people or even jobs.  It means being intentional about how we spend our time.  I have not been intentional enough lately. 

Moni, suggested I should set a time to go to bed and announce it to my mother.  I should also then go to my room and not let her interrupt my “quiet” time.  I can then read some more if I want.  I am going to take it a step further.  I am going to be pickier about the books I put on my Kindle.  I am going to set the standard that I will only read one book an evening.  When I go to my room at 10, the time there will be used to read my Bible and pray more or to journal.  I need to spend time with the Lord listening to what he has to say and dialoging with him in a journal.  And I will not stay up past midnight.  I will also continue to declutter my Kindle until the only books left are the ones I really like and will read again. 

For me, reading so much has become a way to passively deal with things I don’t like in my life.  It is not a good way to do this. 

Do you have any habits that are cluttering your life?

Colleen’s 10c worth

I have often wondered about this in relation to all my blog readers who are avid readers. Not being much of a reader myself it is easy to form the opinion that reading can consume an awful lot of a person’s time that might be better spent doing less pleasant things they are avoiding.

I will be the first to insist that everyone is entitled to a certain amount of downtime in their day. We all need relaxation time in which to wind down and rest mentally and physically. However sometimes it is also good to do the math on how much downtime we are weaving into our day. Also trying to mentally relax while knowing that there are chores you have left undone, leaving your home unpleasant, can be counterproductive to rejuvenation. And never discount the the tranquility of mind that comes from knowing you have achieved something extra in your day. Especially an extra that can be a permanent fixture. Who among you has later interrupted your downtime to return to that drawer or shelf, you earlier uncluttered and reorganised, just to enjoy the feeling of accomplishment again. I know I have, sometimes more than once.

Today’s Mini Mission

Find something in your closet that you haven’t used for three months and let it go.

I have a friend who wants to be a stay-at-home mom.  She and her husband have been working to figure out how they can make it possible.  My mother has always said she wishes we had another bedroom for the guests that never visit.  These are just two examples of how you need to consider the cost.

What do I mean by “consider the cost?”  It means considering the cost of having what you have and how to afford what you want.  In the case of Mom’s wish for another bedroom you have to consider the cost of heating/cooling that room, the cost of additional time to clean it, the cost of a larger payment for the home, the cost of the increased taxes, and numerous other costs.  Is having that extra room worth the cost?

Consider my friend’s dilemma.  What can they do to make it possible for her to stay home with their children?  We all know that owning a home (even paying a mortgage) is cheaper than renting.  At least that is the case here in the US right now.  Like in the case above there are many costs to maintaining a home.  We know that the bigger it is the more costly it is to own and run. Along with the cost we have mentioned in the first example there are also the costs to owning and maintaining items like cars, lawn mowers, and other items.  They all have maintenance and replacement costs.  If you add up these costs and divide the total by your hourly pay (including taxes) you will come up with the number of hours you have to work to pay for these items. 

What does this have to do with decluttering you ask?  Consider the cost–the cost of maintaining the room, the maintenance and the necessity of everything you have.  I’m sure that Colleen can tell you that the home they have now costs much less than their previous home.  Society has lulled us into thinking we need much more that we really do in order to “get a life.”  Does your family really need the size of your present home?  Do you need that extra bedroom, that office, that bonus room, that third garage bay, etc?   Do you need those 4 TV’s, that extra car, that room full of craft supplies, that garage full of “toys” (or junk), those skis when you only get used twice a year, etc?  Life is always in flux and needs change. 

Let’s go back to my friend’s dilemma.  How did they resolve it?  They downsized.  Here in this area of Arizona the eco-friendly landscape is one that has rock, cactus and a few other low-moisture plants/trees.  It means minimal maintenance.  So they downsized to a home just the size for their family with an eco-friendly landscape.  They traded his truck for an economy model.  The huge kitchen was traded for one that contained just what they needed and used.  For everything they had they considered the cost and over half of what they owned made the cut. 

Are you considering the cost of everything you own?  How can that help you make decisions that will make things easier and less costly for you?

Today’s Mini Mission

Declutter something cold to the touch.

Eco Tip for the Day

Deb post today is a good example of thinking about the cost of things. The more you save on things you don’t need is of benefit to the environment as well. Everything we consume has some sort of effect on the environment. So don’t think about what you are giving up for the sake of the environment, instead think what both you and the environment have to gain.

For a full list of my eco tips so far click here

It matters not how fast I go, I hurry faster when I’m slow

I had a reader back in the early days of my blog who seemed to have trouble letting go of her clutter. It wasn’t that she wanted to keep the stuff, or found it difficult to make the choices as to what to let go however she balked at getting on with the task. To me it was obvious that her problem was that she didn’t like seeing anything go to waste.

You see she was very eco friendly, to the point where it was a mission to throw nothing in the trash. And I think this noble goal interfered with her goal to rid her home of clutter. As you all know I am not a lover of waste myself and do what I can to refuse, reuse, reduce and recycle.  In a way I am pleased to say that 99.9% of what I have decluttered has been rehoused, reused, recycled or repurposed. Pleased, because I didn’t just have a house full of trash but sorry that I had so much useful-to-someone-else stuff sitting around unused for long periods of time.

And just because some things don’t work as they should doesn’t mean they aren’t useful to someone. Below are my suggestions on how to deal with such items.

The best way I found to pass on items that have faults is to list them on freecycle or local buy-swap-&-sell or similar web sites, utilise the curb side giveaway method or word of mouth. Explain the fault/s clearly and allow people to decide for themselves if they care or even possibly have the ability to repair them. Through the avenues mentioned above I decluttered all of the following items.

1. All the parts to my malfunctioning Kenwood mixer, then gave the mixer to the last guy who came along who was keen to dabble with it to see if he could get it working or use the parts.
2. The hutch section of a buffet and hutch to a guy who did cabinet making as a hobby. He had a use for the parts and wood while I had a use for the buffet. Everyone was happy. He even asked to let me know if I ever wanted to part with the matching coffee table. I eventually did and he paid me $40 for it.
3. I advertised a lamp, which was unwired, on freecycle and a lady took it with the hope that her electrician son would rewire it for her.
4. I put a trampoline on the street with a FREE sign on it. It needed some restitching but everything else about it was great. It disappeared quickly.
5. I gave an old vacuum cleaner, whose insulation was degrading and blowing out through the air vent, to a lady who was sure she could either clean it up or use the parts.
6. I sole an iRobot vacuum cleaner for parts on ebay.

And these were just the items I could remember in a hurry.

There is usually someone out there who can find a use for things, working or not. Should it not work out for them you will be non the wiser and be happy that you did your best to find a new home for the item. And the stuff that no one wants may just have to end up in the bin. Just remember it is just stuff after all and possibly not wise purchases in the first place. Let it go and learn from the experience. You will hopefully just be a bit more discerning about what to purchase in the future.  Some, on the other hand, are well used items that might just have come to the end of their usefulness and there is certainly no shame in throwing them away.

Today’s Mini Mission

Declutter your handbag so it is easy to find what you need in there when you need it.

“If we do not feel grateful for what we already have, what makes us think we’d be happy with more?” — Unknown

Do you have trouble with procrastination? Is “later” always the perfect time to do something? Are you stressed, missing deadlines, and constantly playing catch-up? Well…..hello! It’s so nice to meet a kindred spirit! Procrastination has always been one of my worst habits. But I recently finished an online course in “Learning How to Learn” (www.coursera.org) that has taught me something new about procrastination.
Brain researchers have discovered that when we dread doing an activity, the thought registers in the same physical area of our brain where pain registers. So naturally, we do the same thing we do when confronted with pain – we attempt to avoid it. However, the minute we refocus or re-frame our thinking by looking at the first step needed to successfully tackle a project — well, then the thought moves out of the area where pain registers and into an area I call the “getting things done” area. More focus – without the pain association! This has been such a tremendous help to me.
Now, instead of looking at years of files that need to be sorted and thinking, “I’ll get to that first thing tomorrow,” I focus on what my beginning step should be to get the job started. In this case, my beginning step included:
• using a filing crate and creating categories for the files I want to keep
• purchasing a shredder
• making a commitment to go through at least 5 files a day.
This has really jump-started my file de-cluttering process. I usually end up purging and sorting more than 5 files, but if not, I still pat myself on the back for the progress I am making.
Another helpful tip is to use a timer. Our brains tend to function better if we alternate 20-25 minutes of focused activity with a 5 minute break. The key is set your timer for both the activity time and the break time, so your breaks don’t end up getting you side tracked. (Can you tell I am speaking from experience?!) If possible, try to walk during some of your breaks, even if it is just walking in place for those few minutes. The process of moving first your right foot, and then your left (or left and then right!), activates the connection between your right and left brain sections. This helps you think more creatively and effectively.
Re-focusing my thinking on the process instead of the end result has helped me so much. I hope it helps someone else, too!
Jackie
P.S. The “Learning How to Learn” course is being offered again by Coursera. It is free and worth checking out. The course began on October 3, but you can jump in at any time during the four week course. Here is the link: https://www.coursera.org/course/learning

It matters not how fast I go, I hurry faster when I’m slow

How much time do you waste in your day then profess to have no time to get your house in order. No time to begin decluttering that stuff that is making it difficult to keep your house in order.

We are all entitled to downtime. I am not going to argue that fact. The question is has your downtime taken over. And do you actually feel better or worse for it. I know that when I have been sitting idle for too long not doing anything useful I start getting agitated and feel the need to get up and make myself useful. I think it is a guilt feeling from being slothful. Once again I am not talking about rest time I am talking about wasted time when enough rest has already been had.

As this weeks mini missions show it isn’t hard to find a little time every now and again to fit in a little delcuttering or perhaps you could even use the time to do some much needed quick tasks around your house. In the time it takes to boil the kettle and brew the tea I can manage to empty the dishwasher. During add times on television I can put away the folded washing. The washing itself can be folding while watching television, as can ironing, sorting papers, doing a decluttering of your jewellery box or make-up kit. You can even pull out a drawer, bring it into the living room and declutter while watching your favourite show. You can clean the rubbish out of your handbag while waiting for an appointment. There is sure to be a rubbish bin close by to throw the trash into. And with a little imagination you can find many periods where time can be better used.

This morning I was feeling listless so I did the ironing. I felt much better for it. This evening while my husband was watching a movie, I wasn’t that interested in, I did some reorganising and a little decluttering in my craft room. I must admit I am a little “different” because I actually enjoy organising and decluttering so I wouldn’t consider this task a chore, but you get the idea. I enjoy the challenge, thinking outside the box and, of course, the end result. And of course I enjoy my actual downtime when I take it, happy in the knowledge that I am keeping up with my household chores.

Lets go back to that ironing I mentioned. I don’t know anyone who enjoys ironing. I don’t have a lot of it and can easily ignore it in the laundry cupboard for weeks before clothing items are needed or my husband runs out of hankies. (Yes I iron the hankies, not linen, underwear, jeans or t-shirts though so please don’t judge.) When I say ignore, I mean the items that do require ironing won’t run down for a while. But one thing I hate worse than ironing is feeling like I have neglected a task until desperation sets in. Especially when I know that I have had plenty of opportunity to get on with the task sooner. It makes me feel lazy and inefficient which permeates my downtime.

I know from experience that many people feel a similar way about their lack of effort to declutter. They know they need to do it, that they want it done but can’t bring themselves to make the effort. And often their downtime is marred by that fact that they know this task is being neglected because the evidence of this is staring them right in the face. Goading them and nagging when they should be relaxed and tranquil. Hours and hours are wasted feeling far less than tranquil in the effort to avoid something that would take much less time to solve.

So don’t waste those spare minutes here and there where you can achieve more than you would expect. I have been following my own advice about this to the letter over for the last week and I have achieve things that have been waiting around for me to do for weeks if not months. Nothing that important but nevertheless things that have quietly been nagging me to get them done. Not only can I go on my vacation content with my achievements but when I get home I will be able to ease on into routine with

Today’s Mini Mission

While brushing your teeth open your peruse your toiletries and/or make-up in your bathroom and declutter something that you no longer use or is out of date.

“If we do not feel grateful for what we already have, what makes us think we’d be happy with more?” — Unknown

Life is, at the very least, punctuated with stressful periods. For some there are no end of stressors almost 24/7 365 days of the year. Mostly this is caused by the complications of life. Past history, current hassles, work obligations, financial issues, family, illness… Boy, this is making me feel depressed just writing about it and my life is quite sweet for the most part.

The one thing I have learned from my decluttering experience is that simplification is the key. The more you own the more you have to take care of. The more work the is required from you. And all that acquiring means less savings in the bank when needed. Add that to all the other stressors and things can get really ugly.

What could be worse than a sudden health issue just when your rent has gone up and you have to take unpaid time off work. I’ll tell you what could be worse, and that is being surrounded by a messy, cluttered home when you are in the thick of it. During times of stress it is a wonderful thing to have a welcoming haven to return to at the end of the day. A welcoming place to cocoon yourself in to recuperate.

Sometimes when life is going well for you it can go to hell for someone close to you and you need to step in to help. Once again it is nice to feel free to be able to do that because things are simplified in your life.

Either way it is best to live by the Boy Scout motto of be prepared. I have found myself in both situations in recent years on several occasions and I have been able to step up to the plate at the drop of a hat. When my son had his accident, when I was having health issues, when my father went into hospital, when my daughter came home at short notice, in the last couple of weeks when I dashed off to help my friend with her move.

So don’t leave it until life happens to realise that you should get your own nest into shape. Get started now so that when things hit the fan you at least can be sure of is a place or peace and serenity to recharge in.

Today’s Mini Mission

Declutter an item that brings you unnecessary feelings of sadness whenever you lay eyes on it.

“If we do not feel grateful for what we already have, what makes us think we’d be happy with more?” — Unknown

Eco Tip for the Day

Don’t accept free promotional products that you have no use for. Accepting these just encourages the continuation of this practice while the environment would be healthier without the manufacture of cheap throwaway or needless items like these usually are.

For a full list of my eco tips so far click here

It matters not how fast I go, I hurry faster when I’m slow

I received a comment from Michelle yesterday in response to the day’s mini mission ~ Declutter a sentimental item that doesn’t bring much in the way of happy memories. Michelle took on this challenge and then some. the conclusion she came to during this task was very insightful. So much so that I wanted to share it with you all. Here is what she had to say…

Michelle ~ “I guess this would go for both Monday and Saturday. I have mentioned before that I collect (maybe USED to collect??) vintage brooches. I have somewhere along the lines of 75-90 regular ones and then about 45 Christmas brooches. Yesterday I pulled out all of them and emotionally distanced myself from them. I quickly handled each one and the questions were, do I like this? Do I wear this? 5 were gifts from gal friends and 8 were gifts from my mom. Only 1 had I bought. Of the Christmas pins, 8 of them I decided need to go. That’s 22 pins. Good grief. I also tossed in two vintage necklaces.

What I got from this exercise is that if we put away the emotions, the decision becomes so much easier. There was a really neat result from this: Now when I look in my jewelry box, I love everything I see. I don’t get frustrated pawing through the junk to get to the good. It’s all good. And quicker to get ready. This could be true for the closet too. If you love everything in there, then the frustration goes away.

It’s really neat the way that with less things and having only things you love around you, a feeling of contentment grows. I probably won’t add to the pin collection. I have plenty. “

It never ceases to amaze me how many ways there are of saying the same thing and Michelle achieved that with her comment ~ “…if we put away the emotions, the decision becomes so much easier.” and it is so true. Focus on the desire to minimise your possessions and don’t allow emotions of silly sentiment, obligation and aspiration get in your way and you will soon find that there are many things you are keeping that you have no love or need for. Let these things go and you will find space opening up all around your home.

Michelle followed her comment up with more detail. You can read it here.

Today’s Mini Mission

Declutter something left in your home by someone else.

Eco Tip for the Day

Cooking oats for breakfast soak them in water overnight. This will cut down on the cooking time thus saving power.

For a full list of my eco tips so far click here

It matters not how fast I go, I hurry faster when I’m slow

Cindy

Recently a friend was cleaning out items from his mother’s estate, a chore than sadly has stretched on at least two years now. He brought over a bag of craft supplies, jewelry, and a peanut butter jar full of needles and other small sewing items.  In pretty short order, Dan and the girls and I sorted through the jewelry and craft supplies. Only the peanut butter jar remained. Specifically, it remained on my desk for weeks. Finally I got sick of looking at it there, so I moved it to the kitchen island to motivate myself to sort through it. There is remained for another month. I looked at it yesterday and realized that I still hadn’t sorted through it and that, more importantly, I obviously didn’t care. I don’t need any needles; I don’t need any pins. I suppose it’s possible that there is some tiny sewing item in the jar that might make my sewing box better and more complete, but I don’t know what it is and (say it with me) I don’t care. It’s just clutter. I don’t know everything that’s in that jar, and I just don’t care. It wasn’t my clutter, but then I let it become my clutter. I put it into the thrift store bag without opening it. Problem taken care of.

We think that we have to sort, and categorize, and make a wise decision about every item that needs to be decluttered. Maybe it doesn’t matter to you; maybe you don’t care.  Do you need to look through each craft supply, each ball of yarn, each set of beads and make a separate and independent decision? Not if you don’t care. Just get rid of the whole lot and be finished with it. Same with books, tools, cookware, collectibles – anything that you feel this constant, aching need to “deal” with when you just really don’t want to. Let me free you from that nagging thought. Who cares if you could make a few bucks on Ebay? Who cares if one of those 100 books might be worth more than 25 cents at a garage sale? Just free them from your life. Sometimes it’s okay not to care.

Today’s Mini Mission

Declutter a souvenir.

Eco Tip For The Day

Drink tap water in preference to carbonated beverages. It doesn’t take a genius to work out how much better that is for the environment. Your waistline and your teeth will thank you for it as well.

It matters not how fast I go, I hurry faster when I’m slow